COLORADO FASHION

Before going to Colorado, Jenny spent weeks making sure that we had the proper clothes. We all had to buy “snow” everything – boots, socks, pants, coats, gloves, etc. etc. It had to be waterproof. Try to find that in good old H Town and at a reasonable price. However, my wonderful and very organized daughter watched store ads and sent us to all the right places to outfit us.

As you know by the previous post, we went snow tubing on Copper Mountain. The low was -17 degrees. Yes, you read that right. -17! I donned all of my layers and felt very smug that I was ready for anything, as I quickly felt like I was going to die from heat stroke while standing in their apartment. Yes, with my many layers and all waterproof, I was ready for any snow adventure. Bring on the cold!!!!

Unfortunately, I didn’t think about a little action that we do when we get into a car. You have to be able to bend to sit down. Well, dear readers, it was not a pretty sight. I .. just… could… not …. bend! I finally leaned into the car and fell into the seat. This was definitely not good. Surely, I just needed to break my snow gear in and riding in the car would probably loosen things up.

It was quickly determined that we would have to stop at Target. Everyone needed a few items and my sunglasses broke in half when I put them on. Can Texas sunglasses not take the cold? Jenny also determined that I did not have a warm hat. I hate hats. Jenny had us on a tight schedule and we only had 20 minutes in Target. I had to make two fashion decisions in 20 minutes! Oh my! All of the sunglasses looked alike so not much time was taken there, but the hats were another story. They had hundreds of hats and did I mention that I hate hats. With Jenny harassing helping me, she kept saying,“ Hurry up, that looks fine, now hurry up.”   I quickly became confused. However, a lady walked in with her entire family to outfit them with a hat she had bought the previous day. She claimed it was absolutely the warmest hat she had ever owned and they did have one left in pink.  So, I grabbed up the below hat in pink with brown fur.

Yes, folks, having no mirror to look at myself, I did purchase a pink trooper style, aviator hat with brown fur. I believe this style hat was last featured on “Leave It To Beaver”.  Beaver wore a brown one to school every winter as all good 1950's boys did.  I wish I could have gotten the white fur one.  Little did I know that the brown fur made me look like my bangs started at the top of my head and that I had dyed them brown!

After riding several hours in the car to reach Copper Mountain, I discovered my clothes still would not bend so I rolled myself out of the car. It was then that I noticed that I walked stiff legged with my arms held out just like the bundled up little boys in the movie, "A Christmas Story".  We had to walk through snow to reach the bus to the ski lodge, so I continued to try to break my clothes in. It quickly became apparent that nothing was working. So, I spent the time we had in the ski lodge securing our tickets, etc., trying not to sit down.

Please notice these folks can bend!

Soon, everyone was enjoying the beautiful view of the mountains and our snow tube run. However, I was filled with dread at the thought of trying to sit down on my snow tube. We secured our tubes and rode up the mountain on a conveyor belt system.  Thankfully, we stood on the belt to ride up the mountain! 

At the top, Sonny got my tube in place and told me to sit down. I think I must have looked like a dog does before it settles in its bed for the night. You know how they will circle their bed several times in both directions before finally sitting down on it. Yes, that was me. I circled that tube several times and tried several different ways to sit on it without success.  My dear husband grew very impatient as I held up the line.  He soon half snarled in my ear,“ What is wrong? GET IN THE TUBE!”  Finally out of desperation, I stood in front of the tube, calculated the distance, closed my eyes and fell backwards. What form! What grace!!!  I did managed to land half way in the tube.  Sonny quickly pushed me all the way in so that the handsome, athletic young man in charge of keeping the line moving could shove me down the hill. I am afraid that all of my visions of being a beautiful, stylish and graceful snow bunny were shattered. And no, it did not get any better. Every single time I went up the mountain, I had to fall backwards into my tube and every single time the ride was over, my dear husband had to haul me up out of the tube!

 And then of course, there was THE HAT!  Look at my new, huge brown bangs!  You may also notice that my beautiful daughter, who looks great in hats, took hers off for the picture!  Why didn't I think of that?

I might not have been stylish and I could not bend, but my hat and all the many layers of my snow clothes did keep me warm.  I just hope my family will go snow tubing with me again!